Batman


Part of my efforts to clear up the space around me and create a tranquil area to create in is selling old things on eBay that don’t mean much to me anymore, and as a result, I’ve sent out about 15 to 20 pounds of STUFF daily and raked in roughly $1000 over the past month. Don’t think of robbing me because it’s all gone directly into reducing debt. Seriously, it’s so bad that if you rob me, you’ll end up owing Toyota money. Because my debt shifts the natural order of things like a black hole and it will envelop you and you will scream but the air will get sucked right out of your lungs into an unknowable abyss.

But part of this effort to clear space is compacting things. If something can fit into an existing box that’s already been set aside for it in a similar theme, it’ll be torn from its packaging and collected in the box. This is related to the criteria with which I purchase things, also. At this point, anything that consumes space is forbidden.

Last night, I tore into my old C3 figures. If you’re unfamiliar, they were the precursor to Art Asylum / Diamond Toys’ DC Minimates line. Art Asylum could not yet secure a license to produce Minimates as stand-alone figures, by DC Comics / Time Warner / Jesus Christ DID grant them the license to produce Minimates alongside Lego-like construction sets. The laws governing licenses are complex. One company might exclusively secure the rights to produce a Spider-Man action figure with multiple points of articulation, and another might be able to secure the license to produce a very similar figure as, say, a Christmas ornament – as long as it’s sold as a different product. At least my years of attending Toy Fair has told me this much.

So, I decided to free up some shelf / floor space by popping these open. Of course, I’ve always been reluctant to sell these because my tiny Justice League needed a Martian Manhunter to helm it, and before the Minimates line collapsed (after about 60 really great little figures), another Manhunter was never produced. Because I have a strange urge to complete superhero teams like a meganerd.

I catalogued them on Collectors’ Quest.

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Batman


Here’s the deal.

My life is an unholy fucking mess of fuck. It’s true. This manifests itself in almost 30 years of collected crap that has been weighing me down like a weighty weight. I need to fix the hell out of this, and fast. I’m getting old and fat and self-loathing, and there’s so much I could do with this space and freedom.

Something happened to me, and I feel like I’ve been freed from a desire to HAVE. Unfortunately, this doesn’t make things go away, and I feel lousy about throwing things into the garbage and adding to landfills.

I’m here to offer a trade. I collect drawings of Batman. This gives me peace, and they can all be kept flat in a nice, convenient box until I have a suitable place to hang them. My collection spans professional artists and amateurs, conventions and trades in the post. There’s very little that comforts me anymore, but this is something. You know what? You don’t even have to send me Batmen, but if you want to, that would be nice.

I don’t care if you can draw or not. Comment below and include your e-mail address where the form requests it. If you’re willing to trade me for a drawing / painting / whatever of Batman, I will happily send you a large mystery box of crap. This will include action figures, cards, books, DVDs, and general madness. Maybe art, too. I have this messed-up need to maintain some kind of balance in even the most superficial ways.

Honestly, it’ll be saving me, and I hope you enjoy the little bits of my weird, insular life that I’ll be sending out into the world.

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